Many of us have become so used to the way porn videos and movies are portrayed that we no longer even care how ridiculously unrealistic they are. Two small, tight, perfectly symmetrical, and smooth bodies butt up once or twice (yes), then the woman explodes in ecstasy and collapses into bed, sheets covering all the right places. We see it so many times that it has become an expected routine. But it has nothing to do with the porn videos we experience in real life – and it can have serious consequences.
It may be tempting to think that the way porn videos are portrayed on screen is just unrealistic, but it is very harmful. The fact that we still don’t recognize anatomically correct gender, that differences are not recognized, and that different sexes, orientations, and often other races and body types are not recognized is so incredibly regressive. I can only hope that 2024 will be the year that more realistic porn videos are released on our screens. Here’s why this is so important:
Porn videos are not enough –or available at all
While it may not be the media’s fault that porn videos around the world, and especially in this country, are often deeply flawed or completely nonexistent, indeed, the media often fills in the gaps for young people. Since there aren’t many porn videos, the ideas of vulnerable young people are shaped by porn and movies. Adults may watch a movie and roll their eyes when they see unrealistic positions in a porn video, or when they experience orgasms that seem to happen naturally as soon as penetration begins, but young people don’t have the experience to understand that porn videos are like that. Reality doesn’t work that way.
We watch unrealistic porn videos that create unrealistic expectations
Some might argue that TV and movies are more fantasy than reality, but they still affect us. Young people are especially vulnerable, but many women are perplexed that they can’t orgasm easily (or at all) through simple penetration. But that’s the thing – most women. So where do we get the idea that all women can orgasm without clitoral stimulation? How can a man do that with a magic penis wand? Where does this shame come from? From the media, exactly.
In porn, we see more honest sexual experiences, including the need for clitoral play, than in the mainstream or film. There is more oral sex, fingering, and the use of toys. Porn may not be perfect, but it is a movie, and it gives a completely wrong idea of what a porn video should be, embarrassing women in the process. It is also unfair to men who are told that three strokes of their penis should make a woman orgasm. If they cannot achieve this, they think that there is something wrong with them, but with their basic understanding of human anatomy. It is unfair to everyone.
If done correctly, it can have amazing effects
There have been small advances, and for the first time, we have explained what the clitoris does and how important it is to female pleasure. Talking about it was crucial for creator and star Rachel Bloom, who spoke candidly about her struggle to accept the fact that orgasm requires clitoral stimulation, contrary to how it's portrayed in the media in porn videos.